His Green Eyed Weakness
by lotrox
Summary: JamesLily Warning: Implied incest: 'God help Me: I was falling in love with my own son and there was nothing I could do about it'


Title: His Green Eyed Weakness  
Author: Lotrox  
Summary: James had fallen for those eyes ever since he first saw them on the train at eleven years old. Now as he looks in those eyes for the last time he realises just how weak he is. One Shot.  
Pairings: James/Lily - James/Harry (Implied)  
Genres: Romance/Tragedy/Angst  
Rating: T  
A/N: For those of you who are here because of my other stories I promise you that I will be updating them very soon. I have been in Wales for the past week and had no access to a computer, let alone the internet. I am at the moment typing up the next chapter of Raven and am editing Loyaulte me lie - both should be updated by Wednesday.

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I watched as my son twitched in his sleep and heard him cry out. I wished so much that there was something… anything I could do to help my only son, but all help was futile. He was beyond help, beyond saving, beyond hope. Dying... my son. My salavation. My only reason for living was dying. 

Ever since Harry was a year old, on that fateful night of the Halloween fourteen years ago when Voldemort had cast the curse on my son which had never failed to kill anyone in the whole history of Wizardkind and the curse had failed, backfiring on it's originator, my son had been weak. Some after effect. Harry was very delicate, very small, and very feeble. And I was so overprotective of him, trying so hard to prevent the inevitable. My only son. The only thing I have left of my wife.

Lily…

When I had first fallen in love with Lily it had been because of her eyes… those fantastic, deep, wide emerald eyes which just looking into made you feel like you were drowning, lost forever in empty space. And I had fallen in love with those eyes ever since I had first seen them. Ever since my first day at Hogwarts… on the train…  
I had been so excited – I had received the acceptance letter as was customary even though I already knew that I would be going, and, having woken up mum and dad two hours earlier than was necessary, I had been dumped at the station at 10:30 having said a quick 'goodbye' to Father, and having given Mother a peck on the cheek. When the train had arrived ten minutes later I had been the first on. I picked out a compartment and waited… I was not overly worried at having to travel on the train by myself – I knew that soon there would be other first years looking for a friendly face. I had not had to wait long: Five minutes later there came a loud crash outside the compartment a few seconds after that a dark haired boy with grey eyes had practically collapsed into my compartment.

"Hide me…" the boy had moaned, and quick as a flash I whipped out my Invisibility Cloak and draped it round the boy without question. A minute later a girl with long blond hair entered the compartment, took a quick look round then left without a word.  
I reached up and pulled the cloak off the newcomer, who was staring at it admiringly, slumping in his chair.

"Where'd you get that?" He'd asked with awe apparent in his voice.

"My dad," I said proudly, "a present for getting into Hogwarts. It was his when he was young."

The boy looked surprised. "Are you a Pureblood?" He asked, "I'm not sure I know you…"

"James Potter."

A look of recognition passed over the stranger's face. "Ah yes. My parents don't like your family," he said looking crestfallen, "but thanks and all…" he made to leave but I put out a hand and grabbed hold of his arm. "No wait. Just because our parents don't get on doesn't mean that we can't. Who are you?"

"Sirius…" The boy paused, "Sirius Black."

After the initial shock of realising that the person I had just 'rescued' came from the family mum and dad had always told me to avoid, I realised that it didn't matter who Sirius was and told him so. Sirius had seemed pleased and pretty soon we were sitting and talking like we had known one another our whole lives.

After a few hours of journey after the trolley lady had been and gone the compartment door opened again. Sirius jumped scattering food everywhere causing myself to jump as well. Sirius looked up at the girl in the doorway and relaxed slightly. I frowned lightly at my new friend in puzzlement and turned to see who the newcomer was.  
My first sight of her was the eyes. That was all I could pay attention to: I did not hear her question, did not hear Sirius answer, and was not even aware of the confused look she sent in my direction. Those eyes were just so… so transfixing.

Unfortunately the girl behind those eyes had had no liking for me whatsoever from day one. I imagine that it has something to do with the fact that I had teased her about her red hair while all the first years were waiting in the entrance hall. It was just that the eyes were so perfect I just wanted to find something about this girl that wasn't perfect. So I picked on the hair. And eleven year olds can bear grudges for a long time.

Of course Lily's hatred of me had had other reason other than the hair thing: Lily Evans was not that petty. It was just that I liked being liked, and people liked me. Nearly everybody in the school liked me. As the years flew past and I became a trouble maker, a heart throb, a Quidditch player so too did my ego grow. I became a slight bully because of the admiration it got me from others in the school… especially bullying the Slytherins. It had not taken long to find an easy target: Severus Snape. The greasy haired, snotty nosed bastard who had cursed me early on in third year with a spell which was certainly not third year material, and had caused me to be in the hospital wing for a total of three weeks and two days. I had always sworn revenge after that and the two of us became steadfast enemies, along with Sirius who wanted to join in for the fun.  
Among my group of admirers was little Peter… the small, nervous, sandy haired, half blood in the same year as us who thought that I was fantastic at everything I did. And there was Remus, but Remus was different from the rest… was just a friend not an admirer.  
And Evans had hated me. I never knew why. Not really. But soon it had become fun to tease her, to annoy her, to bully people in front of her and to get her worked up over 'nothing'. I just wanted those green eyes focused on me and I just didn't care how I did it.

Time past and soon I realised that it wasn't just the eyes I loved. Behind the eyes was a very clever, very beautiful, kind, considerate, caring young woman and I found out that I no longer wanted those eyes turned on me in anger.  
I wanted them to turn on me with love.

But how to go about this?

After the incident in fifth year when she had blown up at me for being "an arrogant bullying toe rag" I realised that being an egocentric, popular bully would not take me where I wanted to be, would not give me what I wanted to get.

So I changed.

I became polite, good-natured, and friendly to those I would once have cursed into oblivion. Excepting Snape of course, he was always a special case, and would still be now if Voldemort had not killed him sixteen years ago. We were just the typical life-time enemies, and nothing would change that. No doubt when I die we'll probably still have battles in death, and no doubt Lily would still protect him. She was like that. Wonderful, perfect, good-natured… everything that makes a woman 'special'.

The only thing was, was that she still hated my guts.  
I had no idea what I was doing wrong: I'd completely changed, yet it still wasn't enough. Then I spoke to Remus and he soon set me straight.

"It's not just the changes. Though of course that helps," he said in his usual professor –lecture manner, "its how you act towards her. You've been, excuse the pun,mooning after her for so long that she no longer takes you seriously; you don't exactly have a reputation for staying with the same girl for a long time. You need to show her that you don't just want her as a 'one night stand' so to speak. You'd be better off trying to be her friend first. Get to know her, and let her see the 'real you'. You're more than you're made out to be, you know that, I know that. You just need to make her know that as well."

Out of all the advice Moony had ever given (and he had given a lot) that was probably the wisest thing he'd ever said, to anyone; and undoubtedly he was the cause for Lily and I getting together in the first place. For if I'd not followed his advice, Lily would probably still have hated me. She probably wouldn't have died either. Maybe it would have been better had I not… not followed Remus' advice. But then, I would never have got what I had then, what I have now.

My son.

Remus was never able to get girlfriends. He was too truthful. Didn't want to lie to them. But he didn't dare tell them about his… 'problem'. – Come on, he was too scared to tell us until we found it out one day during our second year. We confronted him, and he looked so nervous about it. He was absolutely terrified that we would hate him. He was so shocked when he found out that it made no difference to our friendship. The one time Remus did tell a girl about his 'werewolf problem' it did not go well. He came to us practically in tears telling us that she would get him chucked out of the school; he'd never have even the pretence of a normal life. It was scary seeing him like that, he was normally, and still is, very acceptant of his fate. It was my idea to oblivate the girl. She was forth year Ravenclaw, we were in fifth. Remus forbade us to at first but the prospect of what would happen terrified him so much that he agreed that maybe it was for the best. We sneaked into the Ravenclaw common room and oblivated her memory. After that Remus left her and never again went with anyone else. He hated lying and also hated living a false life.

After Remus' advice I did exactly what he'd said. I'd seen Evans in the library that Friday at first break and I sat down next to her. She eyed me warily but I didn't say anything and after a while she got out her books and began reading. I looked over and saw that she was reading a Muggle Book. "The Lord of the Rings". I racked my memory. I swear I'd heard my dad talking about that book. Wizards… soldiers… weird creatures… Hobbits that's it. A ring. A Dark Lord. I thought I knew enough of it to say something about it, so nervously I started up some conversation.

"That's a good book," I said, inwardly hoping she wouldn't actually ask me any questions about it, "Have you read it before?" She looked up at me, suspicion momentarily clouding those beautiful emerald eyes and I shrugged in what I hoped was a friendly, casual manner. She smiled slightly and I almost felt myself melt away when I saw it.

"Yes." She told me, "I love it. It's the best thing I've ever read. I didn't know that Wizards read Muggle books."

"Yeah… well my dad likes reading a lot," I told her, "He often buys Muggle Books for me." That was true; the only thing was, was that I never read the books he bought.

"Oh?" She asked in a questioning manner, "what books have you read?"

I searched my mind for the nameof a book title from the books that my dad had bought me that I'd never looked at and were now lying untouched in my bedroom. "Animal Farm," I said, pleased at being able to remember the title.

"Oh yes? Who wrote that?"

"George Orwell," I said proudly, relieved that I managed to remember that as well.

"And what do you think of the controversial issues raised in the story… and how the lives of the animals actually relate to society and dictatorship?"

It took a lot to prevent myself from gaping. What the Hell? What kind of book was this? I noticed that Lily was staring at me avidly, as if searching for some weakness. I would have to bluff my way through. I could do this: I was James Potter, the genius of bluffing.

I remembered something about the story that dad had told me, "I thought it terrible when Boxer got taken to the vets," I said, I didn't actually know who or what Boxer was, and I hoped desperately that I'd got the right book. Seeing the way that she was now looking at me gave me strength to continue, "And I really do believe that it is a reflection on human nature, on how they'll do anything to get some power and to keep it once they have it. It just goes to show that communism won't ever work because humans are too selfish. It is a nice idea and all, communism, but it just won't ever be able to work." There. Done it.

Lily looked at me in amazement, and I myself felt amazed. How the Hell had I come up with all that? I was saved being questioned further by the arrival of one of Lily's friends, Maria I think her name was, who gave me a huge glare and said to Lily in an over exaggerated stage whisper, "is he bothering you? Should I send him out?"  
I didn't wait for a reply. Instead I left and walked to the owlery. There I got some parchment and a quill and quickly scribbled out a quick letter to my dad.

_Dad I wrote could you please send me as soon as possible the copy of 'Animal Farm'? Oh and the book called 'Lord of the Rings?' Please as soon as possible. Really really soon._

I paused, thinking hard.

_Scratch that_ I continued_ just send me every book I have._

I had broken the barrier.

Lily would come round.

It would just take a bit of work, that's all.

As I left the owlery I walked past the huge mirror on the second floor behind which was a secret room. I stared in the mirror and saw my reflection staring back. I gave myself a grin. "You," I said indicating the reflection, who in turn pointed back at me, "Are a genius." And happily I went up to the common room to tell Remus just how clever he really was.

Lily and I agreed after a few months that we would be friends. We were sitting in the Gryffindor common-room together and she turned to me and surprised me by saying, "what do you want from me James?" that had been one of the few times she had ever called me by my actual given first name, "I don't know what I should make of you. What are you planning?"

I knew as soon as she said this, that this moment would be 'the decider'. Here was my chance to prove to Lily that I was a mature young man who had outgrown all the childish things she had once associated with me. Whereas the James Potter of a year ago would undoubtedly have grinned boyishly at her and ruffled his hair and probably have said something stupid beginning with 'Darling', the James Potter currently attending sixth year knew better. I leaned forward and looked her straight in those beautiful green eyes and said, "I just want to get to know you. We could have got on well if we hadn't hated one another. And I would have liked to have been your friend."

And for the first time I detected something over than politeness or hostility in those eyes, I detected fondness and she smiled a genuine smile and stretched out an arm.

"I hope it's not too late to get those years back," she said inclining her head towards the proffered hand, which I took in my own without question. "How about we start over?"

I smiled, "hi. My name's James, I'm sixteen and I'm a complete Quidditch nut, I like to mess around sometimes but I really do understand the importance of education and learning."

She smiled back, "Lily. I turned seventeen two weeks ago. I like to read and study. I have a sister called Petunia who is nearly twenty two and who has just got married. And despite what others may think, I do actually have some liking for Quidditch even though I have never tried to fly before in my life."

"Really?" I asked in disbelief, "I'll have to teach you then!"

She blinked at me, "I would love you to."

So we reached a kind of compromise: I taught her Quidditch, and she did her homework with me in the common-room. I knew that I may have been leaving my friends out a bit but they understood, although Sirius had been a bit miffed, but a session together of serving detention because we had set off fireworks in the Entrance Hall a few weeks before soon sorted us out. And Sirius was happy for me and wished me luck. Not that I needed luck of course.

I was reminded by what Moony had said each time there was a Hogsmede weekend over the next year: I could not just ask Lily to out with me if it seemed to be too soon – it would just prove to herself that she was right and that all I had wanted all along was for her to go out with me. So I went to Hogsmede with Sirius, Remus, and Peter and caught up with all I had missed whilst hanging around Lily all the time.

All in all sixth year was probably the best year I had had in all my time at Hogwarts.

Then of course everything toppled down around me.

That summer my Mother and two younger brothers were killed. The Dark Mark was seen flying over our house and we had to stay at Hogwarts for the rest of the summer. Ours was not the only family to be affected but was one of the worst affected. All four of my grandparents were dead and the only people left were my Father, my Father's older brother, myself and my older sister by three years, Susannah.  
Everywhere was in chaos. We later learnt that it was because of this new Dark Lord. He had not even been around three months but already people were afraid to speak his name.

I hated him, and I vowed that I would revenge my family with his death. I would not allow myself to ear him. Ever. I would kill that bastard, if it was my fate to do so. If it was not, then I would do all in my power to help the poor person whose fate it was to kill that whoreson. Voldemort would rue the day he ever even thought of killing any of the Potters.

After the summer was over and students returned back to Hogwarts I was never the same again. Lily noticed and commented on my change. She'd not known of what had happened. I lost my temper with her, shouted at her. She'd looked stunned at me and then ran out hands covering her face. I think she may have been crying.  
I felt bad. I could not blame Lily for my plight.

I found her on the Astronomy Tower and made to apologise. She stopped me.

"I'm sorry," she said, "I didn't know. Oh James I'm so sorry."  
I turned away. I did not want her to see the tears that were threatening, pushing against my eyelids. She raised a hand to my cheek and I opened my eyes.

"I will always be here to help you." She told me in her soft voice, "Always. Always."

I nodded, wanting so much to believe her. But I could not trust myself to speak.

After a short while of standing and looking at the view of the Hogwarts' grounds I left without a word. There was nothing to say.

Harry whimpered in his sleep and I rose to walk over to the bed. I placed a hand against his face. It was burning. I looked around for someone but the room was empty. I remembered why. I had ordered everyone out so I could have a few moments alone with my son.

I picked up a cloth and gently wiped his forehead. His eyes flicked open suddenly and focused on me.

"Dad?" He asked in a shaky, unused voice.

"Hush," I said and leant over to tuck some of his shoulder length black hair behind his ear, away from his face. "Go back to sleep Harry. For a while."

I'd not finished my thoughts. Before I could say anything to my son, to justify my actions to him, I must get them straight in my own mind first. How could I explain to my son when I could not even explain it to myself?

I smiled down fondly at my son as he sighed gently and fell back into a fitful sleep. He used to look so much like I did, it was mainly the hair. But when he turned twelve he decided that he would grow his hair long. It was because of Sirius really. Sirius had grown out his hair while being away on a mission for Dumbledore. He had been gone several months and had returned with long hair. Harry idolised Sirius. Had been so upset when Sirius had died… joining Peter and Remus. Everyone of my friends was dead. Killed by or on orders from Voldemort. I am all that's left. Me and Harry.

Growing out the hair had changed Harry's features dramatically. He no longer looked like a younger version of me. He face had taken on Lily's features as he'd grown older and his eyes had grown darker until they were the exact shade Lily's had been. That was the start. He looked so much like Lily.

I knew I would never get over the deaths of my brothers and my mother but I knew that I would have to move on. It would kill Mother, I told myself, if she knew that I was moping around making a misery of times I should enjoy and should be holding onto for a long as possible. So I did. I returned to being James Potter, leader of the Marauders and the most troublesome troublemaker the school had ever, or will ever have the honour of housing. My friends were pleased that I seemed back to my old self, and even Lily ignored the fact that I was causing trouble again; just because it seemed that I was no longer miserable. And I wasn't. Not really. But however much I convinced others or myself that things were back to normal I knew… knew deep down that things would never be the same again. Already a part of my life was irretrievable, already my eyes were shadowed with the knowledge of what the world is really like, and with the loss of those dear to me.

It was Lily and my friends who kept me sane. I am so lucky to have had them. Especially Lily.

At Christmas came the seventh year ball.

I decided that finally it would be the right moment to ask Lily 'out'. It wouldn't be asking her 'out', not really. Asking 'out' was something immature teenagers did with a crush. This was more that a crush. I knew that. This… this was love. I loved her. And I knew that once she agreed to let me be hers I would never let her go. I would give my soul entirely to her and let her do as she wanted with it.

I asked her to the ball.

She stared at me for a few seconds, those deep, dark green eyes focused on my face before she leaped forward and flung her arms around my neck and pressed a gentle kiss to my lips. "I thought you would never ask." She murmured, kissed me again and moved back slightly.

I was dumbstruck and could do nothing but smile at her. She laughed, "Who would have thought, eh? That James Potter would ever be lost for words! I should deserve a medal for that!"

That Christmas night was one I'll never forget for as long as I live.

I had Lily. I had the girl whose eyes had haunted my dreams ever since I had first seen them on the train over six years before. The girl who had hated me with such loathing for years and who had then become my friend and was now the person I loved more than any other and, I believed then, I loved more than I would ever love another.

School ended. The year was over. The term was over. A whole section of my life was finished. The last day of Hogwarts was another day I'll never forget. Sirius, Peter, Remus and I stood hovering in the dorm room in which we had spent over seven years of our life together all close to tears. I think Remus may have actually been crying. Not too obviously though.  
Life was more unclear and uncertain for Remus now than it would ever be for us. But we would be there to help. We would always be together, the four of us.

"Well." Sirius had said, "Who would have thought when we first arrived seven years ago as small puny first years that we would be where we are now?"

I nodded, Peter sniffed and Remus just stood quietly in the middle of the room, staring sadly out of the window which we had once dangled Peter out of three years before because he had got us all detention for a prank which had gone wrong: it hadn't been his fault of course but we had to blame someone.

"I mean," continued Sirius, "life is going to be different now. We're adults. We're going to follow separate ways of life. We're going to be different. I never thought that I would turn out this way all those years ago. And I have you guys to thank for that. If not for you I would no doubt be as shallow and cruel as my parents or Snape or my brother and I want to thank you… I want you to know how much you all mean to me. My friends… companions… partners…"

It was such a sad moment: Sirius had never really spoken like this before, so seriously, so devoid of his happy-go-lucky nature.

"It's all over." I said, "And it only seems like yesterday that it all began. Only seems like yesterday when I teased Lily about her hair in the entrance hall and she snapped at me and called me selfish. Damn it, in some ways I am so jealous of that eleven year old boy facing the best seven years of his life, but strangely enough that ten year old boy would be so jealous of me now having finished those years. What a twisted world we live in."

Sirius smirked.

"I know!" He said, "We must do something that will make us always stay friends forever whatever might happen. Even if one of us should join… Voldemort," his eyes caught mine gratefully – it had been me who had forced him to not fear saying that man's name, "We should still remember who we once were as children. Should still remember for always that we are 'the Marauders!'

"We'll swear it." Remus said his eyes unusually bright. "Swear it on blood." He reached for the pocket knife the three of us had bought for him for his thirteenth birthday and cut across his palm. The rest of us did the same, although Peter was a bit uncertain.

"We are the Marauders." Sirius said, "And no matter what happens we shall always remain so. We are friends… brothers and will always help each other no matter what. No matter what happens we should always keep faith to those four children who found such friendship and happiness in each other. Dark times will come but we will see it through because of that fact that we forever are joined. Swear it."

We swore. And we left Hogwarts knowing that we shared a special bond. A bond so special that none, not even Voldemort, not even death could break it. We four were one and nobody could take that away from us.

Then two years later I married Lily and at twenty she gave birth to my son, Harry. And even though there was a war on, even though we knew we were in danger everyday life was still worth living because I had her, my wife and one true love, my friends, closer to me than any brothers could be, and my son, who symbolised the fact that there was hope left in the world after all, and that he would see good times. I would make sure of it.

They were my family.

That answered one of my questions. That answered why I could not hate Peter, even after he betrayed us and caused Lily's death and the near death of Harry. I could not hate him then and I still cannot hate him. How can I hate him? He was and always still is the bumbling fool of a boy who I loved as a brother. No, I could not blame Peter; he was a part of me. And I mourned him when he was killed just as much as I had mourned Remus when he died. The men are separate from the children. I mourned Peter when he died not because of the man, but because of who he had once been. He had made bad choices it was true but we had promised to always stick together throughout thick and thin. How could I hate the man when I had loved the child?

Somehow I doubt that when Sirius made that speech he was really thinking of the worst things that could happen: cold betrayal, and he certainly hated Peter after what he had done, but I could not. Sirius never understood why, but I do. I think. And I know that Lily would not be angry at me for not hating the man who indirectly caused her death for Lily would have understood. She knew more about my own mind than I ever did myself.

"Dad?" Harry's voice woke me from my musings. To my horror I realised that there were tears running down my face. I had been thinking too much. I stared down at Harry into those green eyes and another memory took over my mind.

Two months before Sirius had been killed, when Harry was thirteen Sirius had paid us a visit. He had been entertaining Harry with some spells that would be 'useful' for Hogwarts when something happened to turn Harry's hair from the shoulder length black wavy hair to auburn: Exactly the same colour Lily's had been. As I stood in the doorway surveying my son beg Sirius to turn his hair back memories zoomed over my mind so fast that I could hardly hold back the huge gulf of sadness and anger than was threatening to take me over. I stared at my son so hard that my vision blurred and I was not seeing Harry, but Lily. They were one and the same.

Suddenly my senses rushed back to my mind and I raised my wand and set his hair right before whirling round and slamming the door shut behind me, ignoring the fact that they were both calling after me. I could not get the image of my son out of my head. Grief and self pity flooded my senses and I rested my head against the wall and let the tears fall; I was sobbing my heart out. Harry came later to tell me that Sirius had left; when he saw me in the state I was in he stepped forward and asked me what was wrong. I didn't want to look at him but I had to. As I stared once again into those eyes I realised two things: firstly that I still had Lily. She was in Harry, was a part of him. And secondly, the most dreadful thought I have ever had: I was falling in love with him. God help me; I was falling in love with my own son and there was nothing I could do about it.

"Dad," Harry spoke again before launching into a coughing fit. I saw the redness on his fingers and knew that he had been coughing up blood again. I sat next to him on the bed and wrapped my arms around his waist and he leant backwards into my embrace.

"Dad. Why?" He asked. I wasn't surprised. I knew the question was coming. Knew what he was asking: why had I fallen for him? Oh Harry if only I really knew why. I lost my mind maybe? Grief dragged me down so far it made me blind to all reason, all sense?

I looked into those eyes knowing that this would most probably be the last time I ever saw those emerald eyes again. What I saw in those eyes took my breath away. In neither Lily or Harry had I ever seen so many emotions displayed in those eyes. Fear, suspicious, pleading, trust, love, wariness, sadness and maybe a slight anger. It broke my heart to see such things. I drank in the sight of those eyes. They were hypnotising me, mesmerising me. I knew what I would say,

"Because I love you." I said, leaning over and capturing his bloodied lips in mine, "I love you."

He leant back down in the bed, still staring. Hell he was only fifteen – how could he understand love? How could I make him understand what I could not?

For a split second there was nothing shown in those eyes, just blank emotionless green holes. Then he smiled and the eyes sparkled and looked more alive than they had ever done before.

"I love you too." He whispered.

The eyes shut.

I knew that I would never see them again.

The green was gone. From the first moment I had seen then in first year they had always been there and now they were gone. Forever. Dead. Cold. Blank. Emotionless.

With tears pouring down my face I kissed my son on the lips gently, remembering the first time I had done so. Christ I was so weak. Was such a fool.

But I couldn't help it: those eyes were my weakness, had been my weakness ever since I was eleven.

How far away I was from that now. I was in another world. Nothing had happened. I had never gone to Hogwarts. Never known Sirius, Remus and Peter: they had never existed. Lily had never existed. Harry had never existed. How could they have existed when they were now all dead?

I knew that I would never go back.

Everything was over… finished. My last chance for sanity had died. My last chance of sanity had never been born. My only reason for living was dead.

I closed my eyes and succumbed to the darkness never again to rise out of the blackness. But there was something there.

The eyes were staring at me through the blackness. Dark and concealing, conveying things I could not read. I could kid myself for the rest of my life that nothing had happened; but the memories would still be there, no matter how hard I try to pretend they are not. The memories would always be there because the eyes would always be there. The dark, sparkling, beautiful emerald green eyes would never let me forget. They would be there. Haunting me. Forever.


End file.
